The Impact of Narcissistic Abuse on Our Relationship With Others is part of the Series on Narcissistic Abuse. It discusses how being raised in adverse childhood conditions or by narcissistic types can impact our mental health and programming and make us codependent. This episode then describes what codependency is, the traits of codependency, how this impacts relationships, and how it is possible to heal from codependency.
Someone with codependent traits is more likely to attract relationships with narcissists and unhealthy individuals. Additionally, survivors of narcissistic abuse can also project unhealed past abuse onto healthy relationships. However, by learning the red flags of abusive relationships, healing codependent traits, and taking more honest self-evaluation, we can heal from narcissistic abuse and pursue and cultivate the healthy, loving relationships God intended us to have.
Breakdown of Episode
0:00 Introduction to the Episode and Topic
4:52 The Impacts of Narcissistic Abuse in Childhood
24:09 Codependency
30:12 How Codependency Can Increase the Chances of Attracting Narcissists
43:08 How We Can Project Our Past Into Loving Relationships
59:40 Ways to Heal
Bulleted List of Resources
• The Causes of Codependency in Sun Behavioral Delaware, no author given, discusses the childhood causes of codependency and how these causes can carry over into our adult relationships.
• Long Term Narcissistic Abuse Can Cause Brain Damage from Psych Central by Kim Saeed discusses how long term abuse can impact our brains, particularly from childhood, and change their wiring and function. It also discusses ways we can heal our brains and neural programming in adulthood.
• What Are Signs of Codependency by Crystal Raypole in Psych Central discusses what codependency is and gives the traits of codependency.
• The Give and Take Between Narcissistic and Codependent Personalities in Psych Central by Marissa Moore describes how codependency impacts relationships and makes us more likely to attract narcissistic partners and others into our lives. It also differentiates between codependent and narcissistic traits.
• Projection: The Great Threat to Intimate Relationships by Leon F. Seltzer, PhD in Psychology Today discusses how abuse from the past can be projected into good current relationships. It also discusses how we can learn to become aware of projection of past hurt and heal this to create more wholesome relationships.
• Healing from Childhood Trauma: The Roles of Neuroplasticity and EMDR by Nancy Lovering in Psych Central shows the reader that it is possible to heal narcissistic and other forms of abuse from childhood, even in adulthood through neuroplasticity and EMDR.
• Effects of Trauma on the Brain: Before and After from the Rome Foundation by Douglas Drossman, MD is a story of a girl who was abused and then worked on recovery. It shows her brain before recovery and after. A visual is a powerful reminder healing is possible.
• Recovery from Codependency by Darlene Lancer in Psych Central lists and explains ways to heal codependency from narcissistic abuse through specific actions.
• Ten Pointers to End Toxic Relationships (which are often with narcissists) in Psych Central by Karen Lamoreax shares ways to end unhealthy relationships, such as with narcissists, in healthy, loving, and safe ways.
• Five Tips to Maintain a Healthy Relationship When Recovering From Codependency in Medium by Alexandra Ringer gives tips on how to create and maintain healthy and loving relationships for those recovering from codependency.
Other General Resources Mentioned in Podcast
• Codependent No More by Melody Beatty is the ultimate source and one of the first books written on healing codependency. It stands the test of time.
• Lisa Romano's Youtube Channel, look up codependency videos.
• Setting Boundaries by Henry Cloud and John Townsend isn't directly related to codependency, but it's up this alley since one way to heal from codependency is to learn to set healthy and loving boundaries.
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