My Journey

Hi, there! I'm Rachel, the creator of Christian Emotional Recovery.

I help survivors overcome blocks to healing childhood trauma and transform their lives.

I've been on the healing journey for over 20 years. I'm a survivor of childhood trauma, adverse childhood experience (ACE), narcissistic abuse, emotional neglect, and emotional abuse. I spent decades trying to figure out what was "wrong" with me. I studied psychology and psychotherapy and tried books, meditations, praying, scriptures, affirmations, courses, and everything else, and I healed some, but not much for the effort I put it. I was even told by people that maybe I was being punished because I was sinning, or maybe I didn't have enough faith or didn't pray hard enough when I couldn't heal. Not much changed no matter what work I put it. I couldn't figure out why I suffered from anxiety and depression, and I was told I was probably born that way, so I believed it. I prayed to God for answers. I got none, except condemnation and stagnation. As a result, I felt like I was internally deficient, and was even told by people, including in the Christian community that maybe I was. This in itself is abuse. I suffered from depression, anxiety, social anxiety, and suicide ideation and thought I was born this way, because I was told I had a great childhood.

It wasn't until I came across a book called Healing from Hidden Abuse by Shannon Thomas that my entire life and everything I knew about it was thrown upside down. Every word in that book was my experience. I honestly never thought I would get a "smoking gun" answer. But I did! It validated everything that I had experienced, and it was a "smoking gun" that gave me answers to everything: why I suffered from seemingly unexplainable depression and anxiety, why I experienced so much anger, why I wasn't healing or growing, why relationships were difficult, why I felt "deficient," and why prayer and reading my Bible alone weren't healing my trauma. There was nothing wrong with me or God. I just didn't have the right insights. This changed everything I knew about myself and my life. I realized I was NOT deficient. I realized there was NOTHING wrong with me. I realized I was FEARFULLY and WONDERFULLY made. I realized that well-meaning people in my life had woven narratives that were simply untrue, and I had never questioned them, even when I did. I had to reckon with some disturbing realities, but this put me on the path to healing like never before. God had answered my prayer of 20 years for answers.

I realized I had experienced trauma from abuse and neglect, and as I dug deeper, I realized there was nothing wrong with me, and that the nature of trauma is that it hides, defends itself, and it gets stuck in the body. I was diagnosed with trauma, PTSD, and CPTSD by multiple clinicians, and I've been on a healing journey ever since, putting the pieces of my life together, realizing that God DOES heal, and that NO ONE is deficient, and anyone can heal. I learned to take ownership of trauma and CPTSD, not blame, and I learned that healing trauma is hard work. It's not for the faint of heart. But, it CAN BE DONE!

In the last few years, I've studied everything I can get my hands on about trauma, (C)PTSD, childhood abuse, childhood emotional neglect, and narcissistic abuse. Trauma gets stuck in the body and we become disregulated, getting stuck in fight-or-flight. Trauma becomes embedded in our brains, neural networks, and tissues and organs. We relive this trauma over and over when there is a trigger, because it has never discharged properly from our neural network.

When we get the roots of what caused our trauma, work on healing that and witnessing the emotions and trauma in a SAFE environment, and surrender the process to the healing power of God's love, we CAN heal. I've been making more progress in the last few years than the previous 20 years combined. I realized how much it breaks my heart to see others struggle with issues they don't even understand and that aren't their fault. If you experienced childhood trauma, abuse, or neglect, or any other kind of trauma, IT'S NOT YOUR FAULT!

In this podcast and platform, I combine the latest science and healing modalities with faith to educate and empower trauma survivors. I take what I've learned and teach it to you, so that even if you haven't been able to heal before, you will be able to target trauma at its source and make progress, living the life of peace, progress, and hope that God always intended you to live! IT IS POSSIBLE and IT CAN BE REAL FOR YOU TOO!